GAZA STRIP CLUB

As President Obomber authorizes "humanitarian" aid/bombing runs in the mountains surrounding Urbil in northern Iraq, the truce in Gaza ends and all parties pick up their guns and go at it once again, I wonder about language.  To describe the thirsty people on that mountain top in Kurdistan as "innocents" as America continues to arm Israel in it's systematic destruction of Gaza, seems the height of hypocracy.  Occupation seems the common theme. The US occupies Afghanistan and Iraq. Israel occupies the West Bank and Gaza. Within these territories war lords, terrorist organizations like ISIS and Al Queda, and sectarian factions vie for power. It's a gun runner's wet dream. The "innocents" suffer. Amerika! Fuck Yeah!

Back here on this safe, quiet, bucolic mountain, with plenty of water, my lawyer is getting the final paperwork together for the opening of THE GAZA STRIP CLUB down at the shul. It was always believed that we here in Sullivan County were at critical mass when it came to strip clubs. There was JOHNNY'S and the JADE out on 17B and THE OFFICE in South Fallsburg. That was it. PEPPY"S was long gone and everyone thought that it was impossible to open another club here in the hood. Impossible you say? That's why people go to law school. It may have seemed impossible for a local lawyer, but they never met my martini swilling, knife throwing friend from West Virginia.  
     Quietly, behind the scenes, Milawyer has been working on getting all the ducks in a row, in order to make high quality "Gentleman's" entertainment a reality once again. In the words of local politician Tony Cellini "It wouldn't be so bad to have more strip clubs......if the girls were a little better looking." Well Tony, zip up your trousers and drop by sometime. The pole is going in, floor to vaulted ceiling, on that little island opposite the ark. Now that the Torah is gone those cabinets make for great liquor storage. I've given away most of the pews. Still some left. I've got a few local debutantes lined up to dance, and am always looking for new talent. Make sure to bring proper ID. This ain't LOLLYPOPS. Soft opening any day now. Stop by to check out the free kosher buffet. Shalom.