ART AUCTION FOR THE CHARITY FOR CHILDREN WHO ARE DYING TOO SOON

The rich are a funny bunch. If they aren't squandering their money on houses and cars and boats and other crap to make themselves feel alive, they are trying to get free stuff donated to them so they can auction it off to benefit the charity of their choice. In return for this they get their names and pictures in the society pages of newspaper and magazines, that cater to other rich people. Hopefully in the process said charity is benefited by more exposure to its cause and some well deserved cash. Usually famous artists are asked to donate a piece. The rich artist in turn takes a tax break on the donation, a rich collector buys the piece (also taking a tax break) and the charity receives the funds. Because they are a 501c-3 they do not pay taxes. Where the money goes after this is anyone's guess. Once in a great while a poor artist, like myself, is asked to pony up for the cause.
   After a week of vague emails from a woman who happens to be a raw juice mogul/art consultant, about a very "exciting" project, I got a call to explain just what she had been referring to.  A rich guy collector was distributing "boxes" to various artists, actors, and others to decorate. I was not as "excited" as she was by this project. This is right up there with the Woodridge peace signs that Bronco Billy routered out of plywood, in order to be decorated and drum up some artistic community spirit here in the hood. Decorating someone else's object is right up there with digging my eyes out with a dull spoon. "It's for a great cause." the woman said, naming the charity I had never heard of and finishing the pitch with "They are all dying." I respectfully declined the box and we left it loose as to a donation. But then I reconsidered. I'm a easy touch for kids who are dying too soon. Here is my donation to be auctioned off at a later date. I hope it brings a high price.

SHALLOW GRAVE

1. Bury the box in a spot of your choosing.
2. After covering the box with dirt, photograph the spot.
3. Print photo 42 inches high and hang next to instructions.