LUCKY MIKE

 I've always been unlucky-lucky. Shit will happen to me that could be potentially catastrophic. But for some reason it never is. Here's a couple of examples:

    In 1985 I was running a gallery in NYC. One of my artists was Stelarc. Stelarc did something he called "Obsolete Body Suspensions." Simply put he would stick 18 shark hooks (barbs filed off) through his back and hang in unusual locations around the world. Being in NYC he chose E. 11th St. and Ave. B for his "hang." These were the days when NYC was wide open. How do you ask permission to suspend a naked Australian by shark hooks three stories above the ground? Instead we strung a cable from a 4x4 post to a fire escape (with no rigging knowledge) and pulled out Stelarc. 

  A large crowd had gathered. With Stelarc swinging in the breeze the NYPD showed up to disperse the crowd and reel in the naked man. I was on the fire escape. The line with which I had used to pulled Stelarc to the middle of the street was too long and had bunched up. As my friends on the other end began to reel the artist in I was forced to release the knotted line. A large box truck (unaware of the hooked man above him) was traveling west down 11th St. The knotted ball of rope hooked on the edge of the truck. People were screaming for the driver to stop. He paid no attention and accelerated. The rope ball bounced along the truck's box and fell harmlessly to the street. Disaster that would have undoubtedly killed Stelarc was averted. The police gave him a ticket for indecent exposure and promised not to show up in court. They kept their word. We all skated away.

   Yesterday I was moving my tree stand from Ray Gilkey's grave to the curve in the river for Saturday's gun opener. I wanted to get deeper in the woods once the shooting starts. All of my stands are old and I'm not all that good at maintenance. When I attempted to rehang the stand I noticed one of the cables that tie the seat to the deck had broken. This was the first time a stand had broken. I'm always strapped in with a body harness except when I'm climbing in or out of the tree. Then I stand on that deck held by two cables, exposed and vulnerable to a fall. I took the stand home and when I went to replace the broken cable the "good" cable came off in my hand. Both cables breaking off under my weight, in the dark, as I climbed in the stand would have meant certain death. Now I have to check all my stands.

   This morning, rattled by yesterday's lucky escape from the jaws of death, I slept in. It was a good move. The thick fog is just lifting as I write this. I'll rehang my jerry-rigged stand this afternoon. How long will my luck hold? Your guess is as good as mine. The clock is ticking. In this regard I feel a kinship to that big ten point and that bear. A tilting umbrella and a shot placed too low saved both their lives. A lucky move from Ray's grave at a crucial time saved my ass. If I was a believing man I'd thank whomever is in charge of  looking over such things for man and beast. The hunt continues. Tick-fucking-tock.