Wednesday, August 31, 2016

LAST DAYS

A couple of days ago i was in Home Depot buying some string and springs for my big upcoming art show at CAS. When I went to check out my card was refused. Now these cards don't last long in my wallet, so I wasn't too concerned. I paid my bill in cash and went on my way. Since i was near my bank i decided to take the time to order a new card. I parked the truck and strolled into.........WAYNE'S BANK? There was one guy in line. I looked around completely confused, trying to take in what had happened. WAYNE'S BANK looked at me in bad graphics from every wall. "What the fuck?" I said out loud, to the guy in front of me. "This used to be my bank." He smiled. I continued more to myself than to him. "First it was Bank of America. Then it was NDBCD or NBDD or NBDC bank. Now it's fucking WAYNE"S BANK?" Now the guy laughed and a strange girl called to him to step up. I just stood there, dazed, waiting.....

   These days I'm wired a little tight. I never show in galleries. It's not that I have anything against them. They just never ask, so I do what I do without them. Galleries need artists, not the other way around. So when i was asked, I was as excited as my inner 13 year old girl would allow. I may own a church, but to me the  gallery is the church. I take this shit very seriously. The Catskill Art Society may as well be Hauser & Wirth, Gavin Brown and Zwirner rolled into one. If I'm gonna show in the gallery context, I'm gonna kick ass.
   So, as you can imagine, WAYNE'S BANK received the wrath of Osti. Shout out to Tariq and all my crew at WB. These guys talk me off the ledge with each name change. It's never pretty, but in the end I stay resigned to every corporate ass reaming by forces unknown, just because of the people at MY bank.
 
So we got it all worked out, ordered new checks and card, etc. and I went on my way. I headed onto the on ramp and traffic stopped dead. Six cars ahead of me was a Shortline bus stopped dead. Off to the side there were two cars pulled over and in the middle of the road danced at least a dozen Orthodox Jewish men, hands in the air, fingers snapping, squatting, and grinning ear to ear. WTF! AGAIN! I leaned on the horn. No vehicle moved as the men twirled and vogued in front of the bus. I'd had enough. I pulled over to the right, passed the line and pulled up alongside the dancing Jews. "What the fuck are you idiots doing?" I asked. They all looked at me, smiled wider and one guy reached out to the truck. "Come dance!" he beckoned "Join us!" I could not stay pissed. I almost got out of the truck.....but went on my way....smiling.
    I asked Pigpen if I'd missed a holy day? He said it was probably just an end of the summer celebration. If this is true I have a whole new respect for the Orthodox. I wish I felt that good about anything. Next time I do I'm stopping the truck in the middle of the ramp......and dancing!

   

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