Wednesday, August 22, 2012

ZERO TO SEVENTY

  I don't think anyone would deny that we live in a youth-centric age.  And I'll be the first to admit I like it that way. It's not so much I'm drawn to youth culture, as much as I'm drawn to acting immature. I remember CLGM founding member R. Kennedy consoling me when i was in my 40's, unable to get a gig, a gallery show or even get laid. "Look, Daddy-O, at our age we just remind everyone of the horrible failure that they have to look forward to. Wait until we're in our 60's. If we survive that long we'll be fucking heroes." Well, damned if RK wasn't right on the money.
   When I was about 45 I started to grow out my grey beard and hair. It put ten years on me and instead of bucking the trend, I embraced it. I began lying about my age. Whenever I could i listed my birth date as 1942 instead of 1952. If I was gonna be a hero in my 60's i wanted to hurry the process along.
   My 50th (60th) birthday ten years ago was a depressing, sad event. I was a miserable, recently divorced, broke, has-been with no prospects. Depression had taken over. Each day was bleaker than the next. Even with the help of meds., stopping booze and pot, therapy, and family love I wasn't able to pull myself out of it. I wallowed in self-pity. But then in total frustration my old man told me to run. I hate running, but it was that or the 9mm. I bought some sneakers, tossed the meds., bought some eye medicine and a six pack and started down the road to recovery. It worked. In a matter of weeks I felt better. In months I was my old self. I work. I hunt. I live it up. The last ten years have been some of my best.
    With the help of the youth, church has started up again, my productivity of art works has soared, my personal life is more stable and satisfying than it has ever been, and I have to say a day after my 60th (70th) birthday I am one lucky, happy camper. Yeah, I'm still broke. Sure, my career doesn't amount to much. OK, I don't have too many prospects. But, am I miserable? NO FUCKING WAY! I am surrounded by love. From the newest member of the CLGM- Walker "Wheels" Budde, to the elders in their 70's and even 80's, the church is thriving. No one cares how old you are. Just keep acting as immature as you can possibly get away with. That's my advice. I can only hope when I'm long gone you have the youth chiding you and pushing you forward. Thanks for such a great 70th birthday!    

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