Tuesday, July 30, 2013


 I came out of my house the other day to meet Irish Liz and her brother-in-law Shmoolie (some names are too good to change) coming out of the church. They hadn't seen all the new work since  Xmas time. ILiz thought it was sufficiently "Halloweenie." And it blew Shmoolie's mind. Shmoolie is one of the more enthusiastic parisioners. You all should take note. Show some Goddamed interest would you? But back to Shmoolie. He's on the lion. When's he coming? Have I got him yet? Male or female? He's grilling me. And here is where I think I do my best work. I actually begin to believe what I'm saying. In his obsession with wanting to make me the new Duck Dynasty Hillbillie with a White Beard, I calmly explain to my devotee, that we have all already won the lottery. There is no need to hustle or scam or sell yourself to anybody at any price. We have already attained Nirvana. The cage merely awaits. I prepare a place for you. Get it? And if we really need cash we got Diamond Dave. ILiz cringes.
   Yesterday I took the plywood cut outs to my sign painter- Craig Stewart in Callicoon. He will now paint on two lion heads and LION OF JUDAH in hebrew script with the color scheme- red, yellow, green. The plan is to have the sign done by Labor Day 2013. In the meantime I've begun work on a Totem Pole. I can't say much about it yet. This will counter point the lion cage. Duh... what else? My brother Duke had suggested a roadside photo-op plywood cut out of the crucifixion. Climb the steps and be the head of our suffering lord. As much as I would love to see this happen, things are getting a little crowded on the lawn.
    When I explain it all to Shmoolie he gets it. Still, he somehow wants to make me money. Maybe we could put a church in the synagogue he suggests and sell it back to Hassidum just to keep things right with Yaweh. I clarify that it will be The Shul of the Little Green Man, thereby keeping things kosher. "There's got to be an angel .....I mean angle." Shmoolie insists. I agree.


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