THE UNREALITY OF YOUR REALITY

     The term "Reality TV" was misnomer from its inception. Sure the concept built upon early shows like  Ripley's Believe it or Not or Real People, but everyone accepted as the genre grew, that eventually there would be nothing real about reality TV. It was a cheap to produce, easily manipulated and lucrative for all concerned, business/entertainment model. Shows like Cops provided an extra added benefit of White Supremacist propaganda to the "art" form, as pot smoking white college kids got a stern lecture and a crack slinging black teen got 15 to life. Ad revenue went through the roof. Turns out the police state destroying young, black lives is very entertaining in white America. 

   This was the environment that embraced that brash, young NY tabloid huckster "The Donald" when somebody in the Trump organization pitched The Apprentice to Hollywood. I can honestly say that as much as I love trash TV I've never seen it. After living in Manhattan from 1983 to 1995 I was sick to death of Trump. Remember the Central Park Five? That says it all for me. So as the rest of America teethed on this racist asshole I tried to forget him. Then, of course, the last four years happened. There's no forgetting that.

    Just before Trump got elected President I had my own brush with reality TV. I was on a show called Obscurities. They pretended to find a two-headed calf in my church and buy it. It was all fake, a set up. I went along with it, just to be on TV. I'm AN ASSHOLE. It taught me a valuable lesson. Face reality. I wasn't interesting enough to just do an episode on by myself, so I should have passed. They had to juice it up with the two-headed calf. I should never have agreed to that. I'm embarrassed to admit it. In the future I should be more entertaining (or more of an asshole) if I want to be on TV. My one saving grace was that I named the calf "Dick and Bobbie" after my dead parents on the air and they didn't cut it. That should get me something in the afterlife.

   So now, after the lost election, predictably Donald Trump can not face the reality of his very real REALITY. The simple mathematics of a vote count eludes the great businessman.  The overwhelming fact over fiction (finally) scenario is simply too much to grasp for the Donald. Trump has shut down in a fit of denial. He's not budging. Imagine Sunday morning breakfast with Jared, Ivanka, and Melania at the White House. As Barron "plays" with his nieces and nephews"the Jewish kids" the meal is a bit tense. "So how was your golf game yesterday Dad?" Jared asks meekly. Trump stares a hole through him. "Vud you like some more cantaloupe Donald?" Melania asks, smiling. "Daddy, I still LOVE YOU." coos Ivanka. Don Jr. and Eric stew in the background. Eric eats a crayon. Suddenly a scream from one of the "Jewish kids" is heard off in the distance. Melania looks rattled, as if it brings back bad memories from Slovakia. A Secret Service agent goes to investigate. It won't be the last time.

     Who knows where the Trump Show will go from here. I would think the sky's the limit for this brand. Tarnish becomes it. The Saudis have great production facilities and I could see Jared Kushner's Middle East Peace Plan being picked up for another season. "Qatar Airlines presents......" Trump knows he has until January 20th to play this all out. Then, I imagine, it's back to Hollywood or Ryad. Concede? Don't concede? In the end it doesn't matter. We'll have to get on without him and he'll have to get on without us. Forget the traditional library. I'm printing up T-shirts. They're really funny. Wait....wait.......you're gonna love 'em. They say At Least I didn't Lose the Presidency. Get it? Available alongside the piles of MAGA hats at a Presidential Gift Shop coming soon to a mall near you. The Scott Atlas Corona Virus vaccine- free with every purchase. Keeping it real.